The Case for Valentine Morgenstern's Dad-Skills

Look, we're not saying he's a great father. We're saying there's a case to be made that he COULD be...


As a baby, Valentine could have sung you a beautiful lullaby.

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He's used to being surrounded by sleepy people after all!

He'd be able to look after you when you were sick.

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Aaaalllll the medicine!

And buy you all the slushies, candy and chips in the world.

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'Cos you totally inherited his persuasive nature.

Think how awesome your middle school science projects would have been!

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First prize every time.

He would have even encouraged your cosplay addiction.

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Hero!

And could never be mad if you got a tattoo.

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Win!

No boyfriend or girlfriend would ever dare to cross you!

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Who would want to get on the wrong side of Valentine?

He can rock accessories like no other guy.

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Exhibit A: Earring

Like seriously.

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Exhibit B: Leather

Your friends would think he's even hotter as a hatter!

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Exhibit C: Headgear

We wouldn't judge you for swooning over his besties.

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Who could?

Think of all the incredible vacations he could take you on.

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A personal portal's a pretty handy thing!

He's even got a boat, if portalling is not your style.

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Every great dad has an emergency back up plan.

Let's face it, Valentine would do the greatest wedding toast ever!

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True story.

And you know dad jokes would not be his style.

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Phew!

Plus you'd be a part of the hottest family in the Shadow World!

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What's not to love?

Have we convinced you yet? Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

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